When
the edgelording is over
trust
Frau
Nyberg's Finest Social Justice Butt Salt
An
artisan rebel salt, Nyberg's patented compound forgoes a traditional
sodium chloride formulation in favour of elements not found on
professor Mendeleev's periodic table!
Our
producers drink male tears to ensure a saltier end product.
unbalances
any composition no matter how well assembled.
no
more triggering salt cellars that resemble small, stumpy penises. you
will receive your envelopes of salt in twelve irregular instalments
over the course of 50 years.
Read
glowing testimonials from our customers
“everything
is under-salted and you have to point it all out”
-
jonita McKeesian (Scotland)
“Sirs,
I am a regular diner at Dolly's Chop House on Fleet street and
recently ordered 'the Sirloin steak plus' which I assumed would be an
absolutely massive slab of meat. The steak arrived smothered in
Nyberg's Butt salt and was inedible. On reflection I feel this
experience has taught me a valuable lesson regarding male privilege.”
-
Mr D. Pargin
“I
have incorporated Nyberg's social Justice butt salt into all aspects
of my daily life and can confirm that this abrasive condiment is the
literal ruin of anything that it touches.”
-
Ms L. Hu (Quinnland)
We
are confident of the quality of our butt salt and will aggressively
defend our reputation from critics.
the
names and home address of inferior salt producers will be circulated
among our supporters.
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